Happy Thanksgiving Day !
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving day and our plans are set.
Today my thoughts are on tomorrow and what needs to be done today in preparation.Thanksgiving day used to be much busier when the kids were all younger and we did our special days here and together. Now it is usually just my husband and I.I don't remember the first time it happened that no one came home but only a year or two now. We did a chicken roast instead of a full turkey and it was nice to have one another to be thankful with.But a sense of bittersweet was in the day.
Now this year we will go see my dad and spend Thanksgiving with him. He is alone and has been without my mom for five years. Hardly believable that she has been gone that long and that our dear son has been gone that long in December. So are we thankful? Yes. There is always a reason for thanks, although I have not always seen it that way since my son's death. My dad is not well and has had one major heart attack and some strokes in the last year and a half. At the time they said six months was about all he would get. They were wrong, our times our in God's hands. So now we have the privilege to go and bring a meal of venison and foods to show our love and appreciation for my dad and to God on this years Thanksgiving day.
I am feeling strange at the excitement I have about this. This is due to the fact that I am moving to a new place in my grief process. It seems some how wrong to be ready to feel new life again when my son and my mom are no longer here. I know this excitement is good and I am Thankful for it... But.. It is some how wrong. I keep being hit by the reality of them being gone and the upcoming anniversary of my sons leaving. I am already focused on that night,the shock and the loss. IT comes without being invited. I am already in my mind trekking to his grave in December at the hour of his death. I am standing with my family and we are talking and lighting candles, we are some how experiencing him being here by our being there that night, at that time when he ended his life. My heart is grieved and cries its own tears, in its own way, without my being able to control it. And yet, I am also excited that I get to be here in the moment, living the now. I have a father who is still here and he is lonely for my mom. I, too, miss my mom and it is a bittersweet thanksgiving without her.
So we will go and bring the blessing of food.We will Thank God we have food, so many do not. We pray for those who do not.
This morning a devotional I read had the verses from Psalms 68:5-6 in it. I have read these verses before and was stopped then, as now, by the words in verse 6 a where it says: "God sets the lonely in families...". I am sort of a literal thinker so for me this was a question moment. I have felt lonely within my family so my thoughts were, was that a God thing? I had to do some research and see what a commentary had to say about this . My Life Application NIV Bible has a commentary at the bottom of the pages so I checked it out. It says that, " If you are lonely or disadvantaged, join David ( The writer of this Psalm ) in praise, and discover great joy from loving and praising God." For me I sensed now that it isn't that God makes some lonely people in families as my literal mind had thought, but that, He, God, is the one who sets those lonely people into families and can bring a praise and help to those who are lonely. The whole of this verse 6 says:" God sets the lonely in families, he leads forth the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land."
I don't want to be living in a sun-scorched land so I am praying with thanksgiving for the process of grief and the deliverance from the lonely places I have been living in. I am thankful for my dad being here still and the gift of his acceptance of our coming to him to bring a small feast of blessings . But I am most thankful that I feel my dad's gracious acceptance of our presence. I am even more grateful to God, my heavenly Father, who graced me with his Son Jesus so that one day when my dad leaves this world and when I leave this world , we will enter into God's presence and have eternity to feast at his table with a pure and righteous Thanksgiving .
Lord Jesus ,
As we head into tomorrow with the plan of being more aware of Thanksgiving I pray that we will be mindful of those who don't have what we have. That your Grace would deliver to these who are lonely and needy the provisions they need to get help and feeding, every day not just on thanksgiving day. Lord for those who do not know you, that they would come to know you and be setting their sights on eternity with you. Thank you Lord Jesus! I love you and I thank you for your gift of salvation. Amen.
For any interested here is a Scripture to check out. John 3: 16-18
Happy Thanksgiving to you!
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving day and our plans are set.
Today my thoughts are on tomorrow and what needs to be done today in preparation.Thanksgiving day used to be much busier when the kids were all younger and we did our special days here and together. Now it is usually just my husband and I.I don't remember the first time it happened that no one came home but only a year or two now. We did a chicken roast instead of a full turkey and it was nice to have one another to be thankful with.But a sense of bittersweet was in the day.
Now this year we will go see my dad and spend Thanksgiving with him. He is alone and has been without my mom for five years. Hardly believable that she has been gone that long and that our dear son has been gone that long in December. So are we thankful? Yes. There is always a reason for thanks, although I have not always seen it that way since my son's death. My dad is not well and has had one major heart attack and some strokes in the last year and a half. At the time they said six months was about all he would get. They were wrong, our times our in God's hands. So now we have the privilege to go and bring a meal of venison and foods to show our love and appreciation for my dad and to God on this years Thanksgiving day.
I am feeling strange at the excitement I have about this. This is due to the fact that I am moving to a new place in my grief process. It seems some how wrong to be ready to feel new life again when my son and my mom are no longer here. I know this excitement is good and I am Thankful for it... But.. It is some how wrong. I keep being hit by the reality of them being gone and the upcoming anniversary of my sons leaving. I am already focused on that night,the shock and the loss. IT comes without being invited. I am already in my mind trekking to his grave in December at the hour of his death. I am standing with my family and we are talking and lighting candles, we are some how experiencing him being here by our being there that night, at that time when he ended his life. My heart is grieved and cries its own tears, in its own way, without my being able to control it. And yet, I am also excited that I get to be here in the moment, living the now. I have a father who is still here and he is lonely for my mom. I, too, miss my mom and it is a bittersweet thanksgiving without her.
So we will go and bring the blessing of food.We will Thank God we have food, so many do not. We pray for those who do not.
This morning a devotional I read had the verses from Psalms 68:5-6 in it. I have read these verses before and was stopped then, as now, by the words in verse 6 a where it says: "God sets the lonely in families...". I am sort of a literal thinker so for me this was a question moment. I have felt lonely within my family so my thoughts were, was that a God thing? I had to do some research and see what a commentary had to say about this . My Life Application NIV Bible has a commentary at the bottom of the pages so I checked it out. It says that, " If you are lonely or disadvantaged, join David ( The writer of this Psalm ) in praise, and discover great joy from loving and praising God." For me I sensed now that it isn't that God makes some lonely people in families as my literal mind had thought, but that, He, God, is the one who sets those lonely people into families and can bring a praise and help to those who are lonely. The whole of this verse 6 says:" God sets the lonely in families, he leads forth the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land."
I don't want to be living in a sun-scorched land so I am praying with thanksgiving for the process of grief and the deliverance from the lonely places I have been living in. I am thankful for my dad being here still and the gift of his acceptance of our coming to him to bring a small feast of blessings . But I am most thankful that I feel my dad's gracious acceptance of our presence. I am even more grateful to God, my heavenly Father, who graced me with his Son Jesus so that one day when my dad leaves this world and when I leave this world , we will enter into God's presence and have eternity to feast at his table with a pure and righteous Thanksgiving .
Lord Jesus ,
As we head into tomorrow with the plan of being more aware of Thanksgiving I pray that we will be mindful of those who don't have what we have. That your Grace would deliver to these who are lonely and needy the provisions they need to get help and feeding, every day not just on thanksgiving day. Lord for those who do not know you, that they would come to know you and be setting their sights on eternity with you. Thank you Lord Jesus! I love you and I thank you for your gift of salvation. Amen.
For any interested here is a Scripture to check out. John 3: 16-18
Happy Thanksgiving to you!
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